February 24, 2011


I have never been a generic girl. I've always sung my own tune. When I was younger (a.k.a a teenager), I purposefully tried to go against the grain. Remember all of those adults telling asking you something to the equivalent of, "If everyone else were jumping off of a cliff would you jump too?" Well, for some reason I internalized this to the nth degree. If someone said, "It's the cool thing." or "Everyone else is doing it." I would be immediately turned off to it. Never would I consider doing it. Ever. Some would call me a rebel, some would say I was obstinate, I didn't care what they thought and still don't. I think a big part of this singing my own tune thing is that I have never really cared what others think. I don't mean that insincerely. I really mean it. I don't understand what it's like to not like yourself. As long as I'm healthy I don't care about my weight (I'm happy when I'm within my BMI and am happy working hard to be within it if I'm not). Make-up is for dressing up, not for everyday for me. I am a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl. If I like a style I'll wear it doesn't matter if it's not in vogue or it's weird. My hair does not stay put and well-kept no matter what I do to it. I pity people who think you have to wear make-up and have to fit into a certain size jeans no matter how tall you are. You get the idea. I've dealt with depression since I was 12 but even when at the lowest of my lows I've never not liked myself (for those of you who don't understand this, depression isn't just about liking yourself, for me it's feeling lonely). I revel in who I am. I really used to take joy in the fact that I made others feel awkward, though I'm not that way anymore, I mostly just feel pity for those people who feel awkward or embarrassed. Anyway, I promise this relates, turns out I'm really crafty and I really enjoy it. I really like blogging about my family and whatever I feel like. I don't have to assert my intelligence on others by talking about deep material. I don't care if people know I'm smart or not. I like to go running. I enjoy cooking. Recently, I've heard lots of people dissing on these kinds of enjoyable things because they're stereotypical. I'm not so much of a go against the grain person anymore; I've become a make my own grain person. It shouldn't matter if something is stereotypical. Do it anyway. If something makes you happy, it doesn't matter what it is (as long as it's not against the laws of God). Everyone has different opinions and that's a wonderful thing. My opinion is that I just wish that everyone were able to be as happy as I am because I take such joy in the things I do and I don't care what others think about what I do. I do the things I do because they make me happy. I will not apologize for being who I am and if I want to do something stereotypical or atypical, you had better believe that I'm going to do it and be happy. To Sum Up: I love my agency and I will use it regardless of who and how I'm judged (except God). Now, go do something that makes you happy!

Also, I hope you found as much humor as I did in my saying, "I just wish that everyone were able to be as happy as I am" :)

February 15, 2011

A Picture Post for Abi and Everyone Else

Christmas at the Dorff's house!

Baby Jimmer (the hat is a BYU one and a guy walking by commented on our "Baby Jimmer").

There was snow. Zac and I both loved it. A lot.

Someone LOVES the toilet.

Zac likes to help us do all things now.

Yes, he is unloading the silverware onto the floor.

Anytime Zac sees the camera he gets really smiley and heads straight for it.

Valentine's Day. Nate set up cute little flower arrangements around the house for me. It was so romantic and sweet. I love seeing them everywhere I look.

Nathan made one of my favorite meals for Valentine's; we call it milk toast. Boiled eggs mashed up, milk/starch/cheese/salt/pepper sauce dyed pink and toast. Delicious!

I got Nathan a "Love Monster"; I told him it represents our love. Mostly, I just thought it was the coolest thing ever.

Daddy putting Zac to bed.

So, Zac seems to enjoy the bath most after the water's been drained.

Nathan and I took Zac to the aquarium and Zac was terrified until the end. He clung to Nathan as if life depended upon his grip. Except in this picture.

I went to the aquarium with a friend who has two little girls. The one pictured below is a week younger than Zac. Cute, huh?

And here are some cute little pictures that I'm posting because they're cute.

Oooooo! Zac has is first tooth! This one hasn't "receeded" like the last first three. It's the upper front left tooth.

Also, to erase some confusion. I don't want to name this baby Audrey Belle even though it's been my favorite name for 6 years. I'm just not feeling it for this little girl. We're thinking Brooke Elizabeth.